In the middle of drafting my family tree right now. Found out that its rather sad that one doesn't even know one's grandparents' names. Then again, you've called them ah ma or gong gong all your life. Little wonder that you don't know what normal, non-grandchildren people address them *shrug* Decided to take a break because I just felt like it :P Not a very good reason, but good enough for me anyway. I have about five, somewhat greekish readings to wade through later; not a very inviting thought at all. I shall not think about them until I have to face them again *grin*

Was walking home with YY today from the train station, and right before we parted, she accused me of being a cunning freak *grin* Why she did that, I shall not disclose :) Just brought that up because its really kind of interesting because I've never seen myself as cunning, and least of all a freak! Hehe. On the other hand, I found myself at a lost of a suitable retort to that accusation *ponder* Maybe I'm really a cunning freak! Somehow, 'cunning freak' belongs to the same category as 'weird child'; they have a rather kinky feel to them! *leer* I have a weird standard for kinkiness :) Oh well.

The weeks are just flashing by right now. It kind of scares me *frown at calender* There's still about a month and a half to go, and though usually totally unsusceptible to peer pressure, I find myself feeling that I should put all merry-making and fun-generation at a hold... though of course, actually doing that will be another thing all together. Harold said that he's not going to Mambo so long as there is lessons going on; in other words, he'll only club when its the holidays. With all due respect, I too wish that I can make such a pact with myself *sulks* But sometimes, its just not good to push things too much :P I'll do my work. Its all about time management is it not? *grin* Though of course, the fact that I'm not a good time manager has nothing to do with anything :)

Quite by accident, I spent a good many minutes flipping through photos of the good old days just now. My good old days go way back. As in when I'm about four. I love being a kid. That may explain my current complex relationship with the concept of growing up :P Anyway, I think I'm a pretty kid :) I'm being totally objective here. Then it struck me that I hadn't always look un-nice in photos. My kiddish shots were great. To think that I had grew up to be somewhat unphotogenic is a depressing thought *sigh* Talking about photographs, my dear YY brought the much dreaded secondary one fort canning pictures! *shoot YY looks* I think she takes great pleasure in making me cringe at my own secondary one image, cropped fringe, skinny frame, too-long, too-stright hair and all :P Met Eunice Chin at the Coffe Club Express! A good chance encounter considering that I haven't seen her for SO long! She used to be my partner. Some time in secondary two. As with all of my partners, she gets exasperated with me all the time, and yet loves me *grin* Isn't that wonderful?! I have totally cool Cedar friends :) Perfect. By the way, Eunice said that I became prettier! *beams* Feeling happy about it because Shermie said the same thing last night! *beams some more* Its always good to receive a bit of ego boost. A regular bi-monthly dosage will do everyone wonders :) Happier people looks better anyway *grin* So I can't be all that unhappy! *grin*

Got to go back to drawing little trianges and circles and linking them with single lines, double lines or drawing a slash right across them. What tedious work. If there's one thing I've found out by drafting this family tree, its that I have one hell of a ordinary and boring family. No lesbian love, illegitimate children or incest. I guess that's fantastic! *grin* I love functional families :)

A little mini crisis yesterday when my Explorer refused to load. As expected, I totally freaked out when my computer do unexpected mean things to me like this ;P I'm next to a complete computer moron, and everytime my desktop refuse to do anything that I wish it to, I can only curse it. It is times like this when I find the existence of a somewhat more IT savvy brother useful. Of course, such instances are VERY rare. Most of the time, I just wish that I don't have a brother and that I actually get to enjoy some privacy once in a while. So much for wishful thinking *sigh* Then again, I'll loathe to be an only child. Almost all of those I know turn out weird/screwed up in some way or other *shrug* Just a little observation :)

I think that everyone should know the difference between a good breakup and a bad breakup. If you don't already know, you should, because its is of the utmost importance :) To put it in layman's terms, a good breakup is always a lot more dangerous than a bad breakup. Sure, you get a lot more hurt and pain with a bad breakup, but at least things are clear and distinct and to the point. With a good breakup, everyone just pretend that it is actually possible. That parting without the usual screaming, name-calling and bitterness actually happens. Well, to be perfectly honest, it does happen. Just that you have to be really prepared for the side-effects. There's always side-effects :P If you have already lived a good twenty years, you should know that fact of live. I would have called it inevitable if Mrs Woo has not said that nothing is inevitable *shrug* Call me a cynic or whatever, but a good breakup is pretty much a fraud. There's two ways you can look at this; the more positive but tragic way or the angry but good in the long run way. If there's a bad breakup, everyone curses the other person, or at the very least, feel enough hurt to make them think it'll last them the rest of their life. Of course, nobody ever get enough of that. They always come back for more of that hurt. How warped. Anyway, the good side to a bad breakup is the total cut, instead of the nibbling, nagging feeling of a good breakup. I use to think that a good breakup is a godsend. Not anymore :) A bad breakup is a lot healthier. I have no idea why I'm talking about this, so don't ask me.

Yesterday was a good day out. I love Saturdays because I feel almost obligedto go out *grin* Like its the go-out-or-risk-death day... if you get what I mean :) I know I get to have a three days week, but Saturday is my only official going out day. The rest of my free days goes to the constructive quest for knowledge *look serious* hehe Oh well. Giving considerations to entertainment value(outside of the film), I insisted on watching 28 Days Later *grin* And it was sure entertaining *snigger* In order to protect certain people whom I'm indisposed to mention *snigger some more*, I shall quit talking about this :) Just know that the show is pretty much like resident evil, just with less cheap thrill sound effects which cuts your ability to anticipate the scary bits *grin* All in all, I'll give it about three and a half stars *shrug* Not spectacularly freaky, but not a complete waste of money at the very least :)

Wonder why is it that I never get to blog properly nowadays :P My mum is nagging at me to help her with the dying of her hair *roll eyes* Then again, I'm a white hair person myself *sigh* Shall not complain too much. I may very well need my daughter to help me with DIY hairdye products next time when I'm fortiesh :P

Wow. I didn't blog for a total of three days. That's really long considering that I seem to have a NEED to blog many times a day. Then again, been trying to finished up my PS essay the whole week, so its not surprising that there is little time for blogging :P Doesn't matter now since I'm back! *grin* Good to type rubbish on my keyboard again :) Am one happy person right now. FEEL SO RELIEVED! No essay nagging at the back of my mind, no thinking of which point is valid and which point is just pure trash, and no more proofreading! I hate proofreading *gag* Mainly because I'm a lazy person *shrug*

Came upon a lovely little skirt in my warerobe today. I'm starting to believe that every once in a while, my warerobe gives birth to pretty articles of clothings *claps and pat said warerobe fondly* Was feeling particularly frustrated at lack of nicesy clothes to put on when I saw it. Just a little skirt that I think has a nice cut. And its a hipster! *prance around happily in skirt* I love hipster anything because they help me make my body look longer! And I sure need that kind of help! hehe Anyway, I went to school just to hand up my essay today, which make me feel rather foolish for I'm rather accustomed to having a three days weeks, and I've been going down to school every day of the week so far :P Oh well. When you have to do a paper, you have to do a paper! So I decided that I should just go crash Candy's Philo lecture for the want of doing something; after all, I am already in school. The philo lecturer is this ang mo, and I love ang mo lecturers :) They are just different. Actually, now that I think about it, out of my five lecturers, only one is distinctively Singaporean! Gui Kai Chong. I'm getting really fond of him! He's really funny, not in the witty way, but just in the cute way *grin* He say the most unlikely things. And you can always hear the smile in his voice! I love people who talk with a smile in their voice :) Happy people. I like happy people! We've side-tracked...

There I was at Philo lecture, pigging out on my popiah(when you have no time to eat lunch, bring it to the LT. Anything at all. Be creative. Nobody cares.), and listening with half a ear to whatever is going on. As I've told Candy, the people in Philo lecture look strangely normal. Not the I-think-way-too-much kind of people that I would have expected. So much for sterotyping. The thing about Philo and me is that I think I would find the subject interesting and insightful... the problem is, its a little too insightful for my liking. Delving too deep into seemingly trivial things. DEEP yes. But TOO deep :P Then again, I may very well take it some time in the near future just to see if I make a good thinker *grin* Til then, I shall continue to make fun of my dear philo schoolmates, though no offence is intended :) Its just a fun thing. If you all like, you can tell me that Pol Sci is a boring and dry subject. I won't mind in the least :)

Would really love to write more, but I just don't much feel like it anymore. Will be back :)

I have decided to be nice to myself today. That's why I've given myself fifteen minutes to blog before embarking on rewriting my pol sci essay *feel ridiculously please with self-treatment* Have been in school since 730, which means that I've already been here for two hours! Haha, it sure doesn't feel that long. Time flies when you're having fun(I've been sittting at the forum drawing out essay outlines). Right now, I'm trying to grow out of the Jerry Maguire tendencies and learn to be alone, for after all, ultimately that's what we are. ALONE! hehe Kind of bleak, but that shall have to do for now as there's really no other alternatives to being alone ;P I think I was the first three person to step into the comp. lab today. The lab technician gave me a strange look and I figure that's because I look nothing like the regular morning person who stumbles in on other days *shrug*

While sitting at the forum just now, trying to write in a first class academic style, I saw the campus's garderners at work. For all those who are none the wiser about the whole scenic layout of NUS, there are A LOT of trees standing around. Mostly on the grass patches where a few tables and benches are scattered around to faciliate some learning under the sky. The tress we have are not little saplings with few leaves. As a matter of fact, they are HUGE, so much so that they create some sort of a canopy above. I kind of like them; imagined that it will be nice to sit there and slog through some sociology theories *grin* Anyway, they were sort of triming the trees just now. Not so much in giving them a new haircut, but more of getting rid of the dead leaves and ferns. They had this long pole with a blade attached to the top, and they just tried to sort of scrape the unwanted parts off the tress.

For some reason, that looks really fun to me! I mean seriously. Not in the manual-work-is-so-old-school-and-quaint way. I always feel strange attraction to the mostly unbecoming tasks. Like tree pruning, whitewashing of walls etc. Maybe I shouldn't be pursuing a tertiary education, but instead doing something with my hands! What a revelations *grin* Then again, I enjoy being a student too much to give it up just yet. I'll give it another two or three years ;)

Have warm Milo inside me, and have done a early morning blog. Feel like I'm on friendlier terms with the likes of deadlines now *smile fondly at numerous deadlines lining up in my organiser* Time to start writing stuff :)

I shall sleep early today, just as a treat :) Finished my readings for PS lecture tomorrow and since I'm skipping Soci in the morning, I shan't bother with its readings *sheepish* Sorry, term papers come first. They're graded while they don't even take attendance at lectures. A very logical step to take I should think *grin* Shall get to sleep now. Feels very tired indeed.

Writer's block. Or to be more specific, just a lack of facts and materiels with which to produce a top-notch political science essay that can earn me an A *sigh* I just can't write shit. I'm even having problems with the introduction when I thought that I had the general outline of the whole thing drawn out nicely :P So much for that. I should know how to do this question, for after all, its not that much different from what I use to do in JC! That's the reason I chose to do this question in the first place! Argh. I hate deadlines. I have to get a good headstart on this if I'm even going to think about getting that article done for Arts Club. Why does everything have to happen all at the same time?! *wail* Fine, I know I should know it'll come to this when I very happily decide to procrastinate. What a bad habit. I should kick it. Then again, you can't kick bad habits. You just take breaks from them, convince yourself that you're cured and then go back and do it all over again just to celebrate/give yourself a treat/whatever excuse you can come up with *shrug* I don't know, for after all, I'm only human(Forget what I've said about the elf and the mermaid. Right now, I feel distinctively human.).

I just can't seem to get use to XP Windows. I'm using the Millenium Edition of the programme anyway. Actually, both versions are kind of brightly coloured with all the cutsy, cartoon-ish icons and has a less formal feel to them. It just that I feel the ME version is just so much more genuinely happy :P The XP one just kind of try too hard for my liking. I never like it when anyone or anything trys too hard. It sort of leaves a unpleasant aftertaste to things. Besides, my ME version is a lot less prone to virus attacks than the newer XP. I think its because ME is sort of a 'in-between' version, so the hackers just pretty much leave us alone. I'm more than fine with that :)

Okay, I'm officially bored to death. Have just added one whole line to my essay, which is already into its first paragraph :P Why do I feel increasingly doomed? Oh, I know. Because I have to write about six pages of intensive discussion on the functions of nationalism by FRIDAY *do mental sums* which is little more than four days away, which is *do mental sums again* less than 96 hours. How very exciting. Then you'll say that if I'm really feeling that panicky, I'll be hard at work right. You have no idea how the panic system works. First, you'll be in denial as to the dire consquences following you inability to produce quality work. And I'm at that exact stage right now ;P How strange that I'm on such intimate terms with the mechanism and yet still refuse to recognise the problem! :P

Have written one quarter of that thing by now ;P I need more reference!

LOOKIE!

See what Care Bear you are.

Once again, I'm leeching at YY's place, trying to use her printer. This time around though, its not for my own work, but for my sister's! *sigh* Sometimes, the things I have to do :P Anyway, while YY is having her luxurious bath and I'm at a lost of what to do with the printer and the switches and the wires, I shall blog happily just to look like I'm doing something constructive, for the benefit of YY's family *grin* I have an image to uphold after all! And I get a cheap thrill when my friends' parents actually like me. Actually, I'll be pretty glad if they don't think of me as a bad influence :P Some of them do... for whatever reason I'm unsure. Then again, I do look pretty playful. And parents never take too kindly to playfulness do they? Oh well.

Anyway, my essay on Nationalism for pol sci is due next Friday. And guess what's exciting? I haven't even written a word :P I have all these ideas that I know will be pretty relevant to the whole theme, but I've just yet to put them down on paper. Or on my computer screen. Anyone who's an expert on this theme can just contact me and pass all their 'kungfu'(quote: Gui Kai Chong aka ICM lecturer) to me :) I'll be one happy person if you do.

I've sort of gone off narrating stuff, so if you want to know what I did yesterday on Sentosa when the whole place was wet, meaning you don't have a life because you want to know what other people do on weekends, you can leave a message on my tagboard so that the whole world can know that little detail *grin* I went out on a date with my darling YY today. A very academic affair which involves us sitting around little tables at Starbucks in the middle of town, staring at thick books and trying to get facts into our brains through whatever means... even diffusion. Study have shown that allowing one's head to be in close proximity of academic works can increase the chances of scoring better grades. Just don't question where such studies come from :P By the way, I will like to know why Starbucks always look kind of golden. Don't tell me its because of the wooden stuff they have inside or the lightings. Because its not. I'm convinced that there's another reason. Okay, let me just accept that Starbucks is golden, just like I'm red and YY is blue and some people are lame green *shrug* I'm obviously not talking sense, but you can not read this. I'm not forcing you! *point gun at whoever is reading this shit*

It should be pretty obvious by now that I'm getting bored. Just heard YY's brother saying something about her trying to show me her new record time for slowest shower yet :P okay, she's back. I can't say her bad things already hehe.

Is today Sunday already? I thought that it was only Saturday for some reason. The weekends always disappear really quickly anyway *shrug* I had a pretty good weekend if you all care to know :) Not a free-from-anything-that-has-to-do-with-school weekend, nor a ultra-happening-and-wild weekend. Just a rather chill-and-be-happy weekend *grin* Actually, my eyes are kind of tired right now, and so I'll much rather get off from staring at the screen asap. That'll mean that I'm going to do this the easy way and just narrate :P Not the best way to do things, but definitely the slackest way. So I braved the puddles on the pavement all the way to Hougang Mall, soaking my too-long jeans inevitably *sigh* At times like this, I feel that I should have stuck to berms or at the very least, three-quarter stuff. Not that I have short legs of course. NEVER that. Just that people like to make jeans longer than required *grin* I mean, its always easier to alter it shorter than to alter it longer no? :) A very sound logic indeed. Oh well. I like frayed jeans anyway *look defensive* Doesn't bother me. As I was saying, went out pretty early by my Saturday standards to meet YY up for a little lunch. It so happens that we're both getting to town, so might as well do it together; company is always welcomed. Was rather keen on having a nice hotcakes brekkie, but then decided at the last minute that what I really want is some nasi lemak(Chinese-styled) at the adjacent coffeeshop place. The fickle brain of mine.

We have about an hour to kill before YY will have to meet up with her JC friends and I'll have to meet Yibin. YY needed to get something for Angela(she's flying off really soon. To UK.), so we had an excuse to shop and look at prettiful things I can hardly afford right now :P I shall say this a million times and again: the woes of a POOR student! Anyway, I realised that an hour is not a long time when you're hanging around, wishing you have money for this and that. Trooped down to Great World after that to catch Sinbad(been craving for the delicious red seats that's so squishy). For a place that's so out of the way, I seems to visit Great World a lot. For one reason or another, whether as part of my pre-Mambo routine or just becasue I have nothing better to do *shrug* Okay, most of the time its because I have nothing better to do *grin* Turned out that they don't have Sinbad. That's fine. I want to watch the Italian Job as well anyway. All I can say about that particular film is that its something akin to Ocean's Eleven, but somewhat falling short of the high standards. On the other hand, the lead lady is really quite yummy if I do say so myself *grin* And I have excellent taste in women; though of course you can't say that about my men *grin* Then again, we shall not go there :)

It was supposed to be Sentosa day, but it'll just have to rain *roll eyes* For one thing, why the hell was it raining for days on end in the middle of September?! In the good old days, it wasn't like that. It only rains intensively in December. Period. Nowadays, the weather is ultra screwed up. I have reason to suspect that the world is coming to an end. Maybe they're trying to drown us... AGAIN :P Can't they get more creative than that?! Argh. Okay, ignore that. I'm just ranting. Being the ever hopeful person that I am, I went down there anyway just to see if the sky will clear miraculously and we'll have a whole blanket of stars.

Okay, MOODSWING. Its the M word :P Triggered by seemingly nothing. What the hell. I'll get back to this.

Things Learnt in the Span of a Wet and Clammy Sentosa Day

Always check the weather forecast before embarking on an adventure to Sentosa Island... but don't always buy the weatherman's word. He can't be trusted! *look of distaste* Instead, seek divine intervention elsewhere. *chant: Ommmm...*

Always be sure of your relatives' whereabouts so as to ensure the complete avoidance of awkward situations where they invite you to join their happy-family outing when you're out on a date *resigned look of one who comes from a large family* Then again, if ultra cute/super sassy nephew/niece is in the package, carefully drop by to pull at said little ones' cheeks and plant kisses, before discreetly melting away afterwards.

When places hopping, alway ensure that there is adequate transportations from one place to the next. Or at least bother to find out whether it is even possible to go from one to the next :P Calling up of friends to enquire about things such as the bus service which transmit between Great World and Harbour Front is NOT cool at all, and should be avoided at all costs. Actually, its not that serious. But its still NOT NICE! *glare and dare anyone to disagree*

Wet sand and favourite too-long, frayed jeans do not mix well. Neither do wet sand and nice, much adored turquoise mermaid slippers. Nor catepillars on barely-there threads and dot :P

That I look good in both YELLOW and RED(aka Dot's colour: copyright 2000). In conclusion, I look good in everything! *self-appraise and smile*

Sometimes, Candy's blogs can kill me. Or on a slighter note, just blind me *grin* There you have it: your typical philosophy student! *wail* Okay, I think I'll forever be sterotyping philosophy students as rather strange creatures who ponder about why a chair is a chair and not a table nor a cabinet, so SUE ME! hehe. Then again, when I finally get to do my philo cum political science module, I may decide to give all the philo people a nice break. For all who actually care to know, I have a phantom, monster of a headache, which for some reason, I believe is not actually existent. At most, it'll just have to be a fragment of my very vivid imagination, which is trying very hard to find an excuse for me to tear myself away from the pol sci text, of which I am bound to by obligations as a potential majoring student. All of my very happy, brightly coloured(mostly yellow and orange) illusions of said subject has been washed away by one very arduous tutorial session, and countless minutes spend lamenting over text pretending to be written in English. The same goes for most of my other modules, though right now, I have chosen to zoom in on pol sci due to my almost constant contact with it within the last two hours. Whoever said that Arts is easy should just be sentenced to eternity spent reading academic works written by the likes of Castelles! *develop elaborate plot to assasinate said evil-doer in the eyes of all ICM students*

In response to Candy's very long blogS, I shall add my two cents worth regarding the very controversial topic of RELIGION. As I've metioned previously, I have a faith problem, which can be translated into the issue of not having a faith. 19 is an old age to be newly inspired in non-secular matters. I actually feel a NEED to have a faith, in contrast to my earlier resolute believe in the virtue of a secular life! *sigh* The other day, Daniel very nicely tried to invite me to his church on a Sunday. Actually, he didn't really do so due to the fact that Candy has already informed him of our 'deep issues' regarding said subject. The good thing about Daniel is that he backed off very easily, unlike some believers who are terribly resilient to rejection, thus resulting in my current aversion to their preachings. On the other hand, I'm far from being anti-Christians or anything as radical. I'm totally for religious tolerance, and while we're at it, racial harmony and all that peace stuff. Will it be too far-fetch to search for a religion, for after all, its supposed to happen(Also read Dot's other works: Find THE ONE: Happily Happened against Miserable Searches). So there. I shall wait *tap foot impatiently* Okay, have waited thirty seconds, and nothing HAPPENED! So I shall just keep a modest lookout ;)

Realised I'm tired. Time to be Sleeping Beauty again. Then again, the lovely prince who wake me up TOO EARLY tomorrow may just have his head bitten off in chunks.

I wonder why I never ever wake up before eleven on a free day when there is no lessons to hurry to. For today at least, I shall blame the wonderful sleep-in weather for my weakness :P Once again, I shall declare my love for my parents' king-sized bed. I totally resent the fact that I have to sleep on a single bed *sulks* That is why I will always crawl half asleep to sprawl out on my parents' bed after they have gotten up to get to work. I think Coco likes it too because she's always sleeping beside me when I awake. Then again, she always sleep with me *shrug*

Harold told me last night that my eyes are my best assets *grin* He's the fifth millionth person to have told me that :) He said that they sparkle! *do happy twirl* That's a really good word! This shows that I'm not lying about my sparkling eyes power *flutter eyes* I think I'm just rather bored. I think that we'll have to do an 'interview' article for the Arts Club before they accept us as writers *sigh* I hate competitive things like this because I tend to take them really seriously and just end up getting all stressed up about things. My article writing is kind of rusty given that I had not done that since my Synapse days back in JC last year. On the other hand, if we're to write for the Arts Club, we won't have to think about the layout or pictures or whatnot because they actually have another team for doing all that! WOW. What a luxury *grin* We use to have to do that all by ourselves :) That's the difference between JC and Uni. In JC you slog half to death doing a million things, some of which you're totally no good at. In Uni, there's just greater specialisation of skills, and everyone is happier! Hehe. Hopefully I scrape a pass with that article so that they won't reject me! The horror. Because they do reject people! *starts to panic* Haha, actually its no big deal. As I've said, I'm just bored *yawn and look idle*

Have to get out of here. There is absolutely nothing to do and I think I shall finish my book before hitting the real books at about three :P May God be with me. Whoever that God may be *shrug* Oh, before I log off, I shall tell you all about my faith problem. I have a faith problem. Yah. That's all.

I got waylaid by a civil servant who used to read politics in some university overseas while I was on the train just now :P He tried to get me to indulge in a little political talk, about what the module is like, what topics we're covering and whether there's a chance that we'll be doing internation relations. Under normal circumstances, I'll be most delighted to do just that. The thing is, I'm rather brain dead from a whole day of attending lessons, climbing countless stairs, and not to mention two hours of intensive political science discussion which left me feeling rather inadequate *sigh* However, I felt obliged to say something intelligent because I have something about outsiders perceiving NUS students as intelligent! I tried to make smart comments, and realised to my horror, that I'm completely incapable of doing that due to my very much strained brain cells. I had looked forward to a quiet ride on the train, and maybe catch a little nap. The turn of events was somewhat unfortunate. I decided to drop two stops after I boarded just to escape this nice gentleman's enthusiasm, though its still far from where I'm supposed to get off. If I have to wait to take another train to rest my beaten up, sleep-deprived brain, I'll do it. And all because I happened to be carrying my very thick, very professional looking political science textbook around for all to see :P

We finally got to meet the arts club director who has been trying to get us down just so she can 'see' us, in all our glorious physical forms. I figured some time ago that writing for one of the MANY publications they have on campus will be good practice and may look good on my resume. Besides, I just want to write *shrug* The Arts Club is one MadHouse. Its the craziest place I've yet encountered so far on Kent Ridge. After experiencing the chaos of the Arts Club room, I began to understand why the FASS has such a reputation. I believe that there are lots and lots of fun, crazy, eccentric people scattered all through the faculty, but to encounter so many of such arts people in one small confined space is quite enough to blow me away *grin* The Arts Club's room is just a rather small room filled with the chitterchatter of post-office hours exuberance *imagine colourful people and bright conversations* Seemingly they only operate until six. It was six thirty. Its the usual students' hang out: there's always music blasting from somewhere. Let's get to the most yummy bit and skip all the less yummy bits :) WE MET RAYNARD! *swoon* I think I'm in love with him *doodle Raynard's name all over homework* But as a rule, all such guys are attached! *throw darts at a picture of Raynard's other half* Haha, kidding really :) I think the fact that he's happily attached add to his appeal because it means that he can't be that bad a guy if he can settle for just one girl. Maybe its a twisted theory, but just accept it :P BUT HE'S JUST SO CUTE! So see everyone, THIS is the reason why I like arts guys, because there is NO way a non-arts guy can be adorable in this exact same way! *grin*

They are just a bunch of totally crazy people. And I enjoyed their company most immensely, which says a lot about my own sanity :) They say the funnies things about one another, and the most amazing thing is, nobody EVER takes offense! Raynard claims that he gets physically abused(we witnessed one such episode when the girls grab him, tied his hair in little bunches and took snapshots! TOTALLY cute.) He put on this anguished, I-am-very-serious expression, and cautioned us to reconsider our decision to join The Madhouse. HAHA! My gawd! I really think I have a super huge crush on him. My first crush since secondary school mind you! *grin*

I think I shall continue chanting about how super adorable/sexy/intelligent/funny Raynald is in my next blog :) Been here for ages. Think I shall post whatever I've written first, and get on with the rest of the issues later on *grin*

They always leave something behind. Dropped something off to be more exact, for of course, they expect to be able to see those things again. Just that sometimes they never do. Most of the times to be more exact. The little relics sit on the shelf jutting out of the wall. Arranged around one another in some tidy formation with no regard to their significance. No relevance to chronology. They should be packed carefully into a cupboard box and shoved resolutely under the bed. Only they remained where they can be seen. She pretended that they were there because the servants placed them there. That she has nothing to do with anything. She has everything to do with everything. Some people are just in denial.

I've slept a total of *do mental sums in head* approximately six hours out of the last 48 hours :P That can only be bad. When I don't get enough sleep, I alternate between feeling super grouchy to a super hyper laughing machine *sigh* I need sleep! *wail* But I also need to blog :) So here I am! A few things made me believe that today is a good day despite EVERYTHING. Things like how Numb by Linkin Park came up on one of the radio stations just when it occured to me that I would like to hear it. Like how the rain didn't last as long as I thought it would, and it was already clear by the time I reach home, which means I'm not stranded at that dreaded place AGAIN! *do little sky blue coloured cheer* Like how I actually learnt something from the tutorials today instead of feeling increasingly doomed to fail my first semester at Uni. Like how my back don't ache as much. Like how Cleo looks so deliciously red and is packed with yummy pictures of prettiful things, some of which I MAY be able to afford. Like how I get to share little chewy pig candies with my friends while stoning at the central forum *grin* Very cute little chewy pig candies. Like how much I get to laugh when Kumar accused me and Candy of being racist when we offered to buy Bandung for him *double over and laugh some more* Oh well *make weird contented sounds*

All my red stuff seems to have disappeared. Wonder where they went *scratch head* There used to be so much of them, all over the place, to such an extent as to irritate some of the people around me. I've tire of all that pink, all that pinkish purple, all that girl stuff. I want to wear red stuff. Red stuff of just the right shade. The rich red instead of the bright staggering kind. Maybe I threw all that stuff out. Vaguely remember piling stacks of clothes onto my sister's bed and nonchalently asking my mum to get rid of them. There is no time for shopping now *roll eyes* so acquiring new red items will not be an option. This has made me a very frustrated colour person... at least when I take time to think about it. Shall not think about it then.

*flips through Cleo* So much make up. Sometimes Cleo just make me wish that I actually use make up regularly. Like some of the girls in school. Layers and layers of that stuff. Wonder how they'll look like without all that colour and powder *ponder* Nicer I should think *shrug* Then again, I like make up :) I just don't believe in becoming dependent on them. We're 19. We're young! We don't need make up do we? We all look pretty already *grin*

I really need sleep. Crave it and think about it incessantly. So I shall get some :)

Just printed my stuff for Cultures tutorial tomorrow. The next step will be to find the time to actually do it :P And I thought coming to school early will do the trick. So now I'm proven wrong, I've decided to be VERY bitter about it *sulks* The fort canning movie screening tonight is just a MUST GO *sigh* I don't expect you all to understand really. Its just a dot thing. And now *roll eyes* I'll have to go down for ICM dicussion out of the discussion group(which is tomorrow). Was it really ME who was so eager to get back to school?!

Am at the computer lap at YH *grin* Had just printed twelve pages of lecture notes ;) Feels ridiculously accomplished for doing something so basic. That's because I'm a SLACKER! hehe so while the happy looking papers sit in my bag, I can take a minute to blog. I have reason to believe that the Red Age is back :) Why is that so? Because I felt a sudden strong craving to wear something red, anything red actually, the next day. So much so that I settled for this top that I'm not particulary fond of just because its a shade of bright red *do little cat-walk in said red tank-top* Oh well. Need to go down for some breakkie now!

Am rewarding myself after completing the readings for tomorrow's soci lecture! *grin* I'm practically drowning under all those papers! *chants: DIE READINGS DIE!* I have one more chapter of political science thingie to get through before I can retire for the night and then wake up at about six later on in the morning, catch a ride down to campus on dad's cabbie then resign myself to a eight to six schedule for the day :) How very inviting. Actually I don't have to be in school that early. But decided I need the school facilities(read: PRINTER) and going down early will also facilitate my learning *roll eyes* Okay, I need to sit myself down to catch up with my readings :P So sue me! Tsk.

LOOK! The political science textbook is actually making eyes at me! *look of pure terror* My time is up :) While I go and mug for the first time in my life when there's no major exam, all the muggers can continue their intensive, life-long mugging, all the underground muggers can continue to be underground freaks and all the slackers can all go on imagining there's infinite tomorrows *grin*

Wow. Haven't blog for ages. At least for my standards :P I think I sort of write everyday. Sometimes more than once a day *grin* Anyway, it just strike me that it's already the 14th of Septemeber! Which means that 911 passed without the usual big bang(in contrast to the last couple of years), since I'm not really aware of it. Sure, I've heard Channelnewsasia say something about having this special programme about 911, but it just didn't stick to the mind. Haha, its kind of strange because for the last two years, I remember writing something about the twin towers or such on the actual day, if for nothing but to remind myself that it had happened :P Maybe people really forget easily *shrug* Besides, I'm not even an American! That goes to show us the extent to which the USA(our SOLE superpower) has successful exported her culture *sigh* so much so that we're THAT concerned about her internal affairs. Then again, you may want to look at it from another point of view. But that'll involve a whole lot of discussion on the effects of globalisation *roll eyes* Pardon me. I think I'm just exposed to too much artsy fartsy, social-sciency academic works recently.

Let's get on with the more mundance things in life. We can't really get away with the endless narration of our life stories. On the other hand, its not such a bad thing is it :) Afterall, we forget things so very easily, always better to write things down *grin* ANYWAY, when did I last blogged? I think its Thursday. Okay, we'll start with Friday then. Friday is my free day! And unlike my Mondays, my Fridays are not only free days in NAME. For you see, I more often than not go down to school on Mondays to zap my notes for the week... or at least get whatever I need from my kind friends who already had them zapped *sheepish* Friday is my bonus weekend day which happen to be a weekday. That's why I go out on Fridays more than on Saturdays because it some how feels like I'm getting a better deal *shrug* Interpret it however you like. I can't think of one concrete reason for that sentiment of mine.

Just went out for a movie on Friday :) Normal going out thing to do. Despite all my disdain for lovey dovey, romantic chinese movies revolving around two impossibly good looking people, taking place under cliched circumstances, I still caught Turn Left Turn Right *look of horror* Haha, actually its not that bad :) A very simple story, with few characters; sometimes such plots appeal to me. The central concept of the whole plot, however, is very intriguing indeed. For one thing, I can see it actually happening out of the big screen. The constant brushing but not seeing *in deep thoughts* Nobody really give much thoughts to the person on the other line when you dial a wrong number. But he/she may very well be your THE ONE no? Okay, that sounded really fifteen. All talks about THE ONE sounds fifteen *starts to feel old and jaded again* Then again, it can happen :) The good thing is, they will almost definitely meet in the end. All the in-betweens is just to make things more interesting, and for things to seems more precious at the end of the day. So there really are good endings :) Maybe I'm not that old or jaded or cynical after all *phew*

The movie wasn't bad. A good start to the day already *grin* Then I spent a couple of hours just stoning around in Borders, eating words. My relationship with Borders is one of pure loving affection. While my relationship with Kino is a lot more love-hate. We shall not go there *frown* Borders has the worn, clean, yellowed-around-the-edge feel combined with the crisp touch of new books. Isn't that amazing?! (cue for Candy to say 'Amazing... Race') The happiest thing was when I found the book I've been waiting for ages to come out in paperback... in paperback! *smile gleefully and propose throwing a party in honour of said book* Its *drumroll* THE CRIMSON PETAL AND THE WHITE! Been lusting after that book for approximately five million years! (okay, I concede that I'm exaggerating) It was featured in one of Newsweek's book review :) Of course, the hard-covered one is still a lot more delicious, but a poor student can only afford this much *sigh* I shall aspire to have a library in my house when I'm no longer a poor student, filled to the brim with yummy hard-covered classics! :) We can all dream no? *grin*

Friday's almost over. Went over Selegie for some soya bean stuff, then its home sweet home! A good day out :) The day started later on Saturday :P I woke up LATE. And you know what happens when you wake up pass the mid-day mark. You just sort of slop around and don't do anything constructive *sigh* That's exactly what I did. That is, until I finally made it to Jiahui's place for our Friends binge(albeit being two hours late)! Watching Friends is really therapeutic *grin* They are just so HAPPY! Maybe a little silly and such, but then, its a sitcom! Its supposed to be like that! :) So had a good laugh and went out later for ANOTHER movie *sigh* I'm really having financial problems :P Anyone care to help? You can call 96560904 to donate to the Save A Dot scheme :) Please donate generously. Your contribution will go a long way. Hehe. Oh well. Just SHOW ME THE MONEY! Ooo.. Jerry Maguire *swoon* My favouritest show *grin* But let's not get started. Oh, before I forget, we bumped into Melvyn and Liyi. Haha, that silly Liyi thought that Jiahui is erm.. somebody else *grin* And Melvyn is look good with his new hair and his ear stud is pretty good too! :) Hmm... wonder if that's the one I'm supposed to be paying for *ponders*

Enough said for now :) Til later.

I think there's a curse on my black, Flesh Imp tank top. The one with the little, hot pink words near the bottom. The one which EVERYONE thinks looks good :P Sure, I like it *shrug* But I'm pretty convinced right now that it is definitely very cursed. And why? Every time I wear it to school, I'll come back and realise that its raining. I'm not talking about light drizzles in the sun *roll eyes* I'm talking about storms, top up with not strong winds, but gales. The last time I wore that top to school, me and YY got stranded at the MRT station until her mother very nicely came to rescue us. That was sometime ago. I decided to wear it again today. And the minute I came up from underground, it started pouring! ARGH. Freaking cursed tank top that will have to be pretty! How irritating.

I've decided that I shall watch another movie tomorrow, despite it being Friday and all(which means the tickets are a hell lot more expensive... at least to the poor student). I think I'm sort of making up for the last couple of months when I just some how missed out on the good shows. Movie watching is a seasonal thing for me. Seasonal accordings to my whims actually, to be more accurate. Caught at least three films in the month or so. A good number :) Then again, you can never really get sick of watching movies, that is unless you really watch a lot :P Like those movie marathon people who just actually doing an experiment to find out how much popcorn they can consume before they kill themselves. I love popcorn anyway. With nachos and cheese. And sometimes I manage to stuff in a hotdog :P Its common knowledge that the food they sell at cinemas are awfully over-priced. But I eat them anyway *shrug*

The Milo truck is here again today! *look of pure joy* For those people without a childhood, the Milo trucks are happiness generating machines that look like trucks. They are usually green with the Milo logo splashed all over it. it carries around containers filled with chilled Milo and little paper Milo cups. They're green as well. And I think everyone loves the Milo trucks *grin* I mean... FREE MILO! *insert cheers* And thanks to the good people at NUS(whoever they may be), we get the Milo trucks at the Central Forum on selected days of the week. Liyi was telling me that it's every thursday, but since I saw it there on tuesdays too, we can never be too sure when the Milo truck is going to give us a pleasant surprise! hehe. On my way into the forum today, I got myself a cup :) Brighten up my day somewhat... what with me having that horrid dream in the morning. Sure hope the Milo trucks' appearances are not a temporary thing :P They should be a permanent structure! Oh well.

You know the bazaars they are forever having on campus? They're killing me. I'm going bankrupt because of them: little, make-shift colourful booths with a astonishing ability to tempt the hell out of me :P Prettiful trinkets(with my current obsession with earrings, its terrible) *sigh* The woes of being a poor student living on the remnants of her not-very-fantastic savings. Then again, I enjoy being a poor student. Though I think I'll much rather be a rich student pretending to be poor like the majority. The poor student is just a lot more accepted, though the rich student pretending to have woes is a lot more popular(the likes: family problems. Blah.). What the hell am I talking about?! Ranting *roll eyes* And I thought only the intellectually challenged people rant.

I think its the dream. Its most disconcerting. Damn.

Just had a ghastly dream. Not the kind where you get chased around cemetary by ghosts, or something equally scary happens. This dream is just so unsettling. So disturbing. And as I've said before, my dreams are so very REAL. That's why I always make a big fuss out of them. Because they felt so real! I can never differentiate which is reality and which is dream *sigh* Its pretty upseting. Sometimes I wish I'm one of those people who can stop their own dreaming. That'll be really cool. Maybe its because I ate a hell lot yesterday. Had just been staring into the mirror and realised that I'm really getting round in the face. And somehow, it doesn't look very flattering today *press flab on face with distaste* And there's no way its going to go off without me starving myself, and seriously, I have no intention of doing that *eat a whole bar of chocolate in record time in defiance*

This is one self-centred entry.

LOOKIE. Lookie? LOOKIE! *grin*

what flavor pocky are you?

[c] sugardew

OKAY. I'm just good at pretending :P SO SUE ME!

YY just commented that I don't seem to be blogging as regularly as before *gasps* The HORROR. I'm actually slacking on my blogging! *slap myself to buck myself up* Oh well, here I am now :) Been rather busy the last few days, what with having to catch up with my readings *stare at piles of readings and stick out forked tongue at them* I'm still behind time :P But then again, I always have the weekends! *cross fingers, toes, bra...* TODAY IS WEDNESDAY! hehe. I should be at Mambo right now, only that Liyi has got a test this Saturday or something; read: got to mug through the whole week. Therefore, clubbing is just out of the question. Anyway, I'm at Harold's place right now, typing away VERY happily on his very nice, clickety keyboard and staring at this BEAUTIFUL LCD SCREEN! *insert swoons and near faints* Okay, so that's nothing spectacular in our IT age today *roll eyes while thinking of ICM* BUT I DON'T HAVE A LCD SCREEN! *grumbles* Shall use this thing for as long as I want! :) *evil laugh*

Today's YY's BIRTHDAY! Man. Now she's also in the 19th club *give look of awe* We're sure getting older :P We'll be needing anti-wrinkles cream, cellulite gel, skin pigment treatment. Blah. Let's sing the BIRTHDAY SONG! *birthday cake enters the room and say, "HEY, that's my favourite song!"* Let us sing it the ELMO way! hehe. Jus repeat the word birthday about twenty times in tune with the... erm.. I forgot which song it is! :) I have nothing to blog already! That's strange :P Let me get out of here then.

Wanqing just drove all of us home! *grin* All of us includes Tan Yun, Liting, Anne and myself :) A very happy thing to have happened considering that I've now developed an aversion to the NEL and their electronic lady's voice telling us how to ride the escalators *roll eyes* Isn't being able to drive a little miracle in itself?! *put on wow expression* At least for people like me who can't even control a bumper car or go-kart by myself *sigh* Yes, of course, I'll dutifully go for driving lessons when the time comes. And I'll dutifully pass it(after at least a few attempts I think). But I'm just not too keen on driving on the expressways where everyone just ZIPS pass you. Not to mention peak hour traffic. Oh well. I think some people are just not meant to drive around like its second nature to them *grin* I'm rather content to just sit in the passenger seat, fiddle with the cd player, sing along and in general, just provide entertainment to relieve the stress of driving! Wow. How awfully generous of me *beams proudly*

There are few-close-knitted-friends kind of people, and there are scattered-friends kind of people, and of course, there's part-of-a-crazy-clique kind of people :) And I'm sure glad that I'm part of the third group! It is a very common trait among Cedarians. To have cliques. Friendly cliques, hostile cliques, bitchy cliques, cliques who form alliances etc. It may seems rather complex, but when it all works out, its just a kind of social organisation *snigger* On the other hand, cliques can get anti-social ;P That's when things are a little less rosy. Then again, to members of cliques, it doesn't really matter, because at the end of the day, you still have one whole clump of friends to do all the little lame things with :) Highly comforting. The most wonderful thing about me and my friends is that we're way past the stage of judging one another. Its something like we've done the judging back when we were fresh thirteen year olds and decided that its good enough to last for the next few decades *grin* At least that's how I see it. Sure, we quarrel *shrug* I mean, if you're to quote Karl Marx, conflict is just inevitable in social interactions(that is of course unless we achieve Utopia, which we all know is next to impossible). Whatever it is, I'm just really happy to boast that I have seven-year old friendships that still exist today! *clap* Goes to show that I didn't lose too many people along the way. At least not those that counts.

We had a huge ice-cream cake at Swenson's just now. FOR DOOEY'S 19TH BIRTHDAY! Our first surprise party in a long time! :) At least we're still young enough to be lame enough to do such things. We haven't been overwhelmed by the very organised nature of things around us and become predictable creatures! *sigh of relief* Anyway, dooey actually cried! Man. That was really unexpected. Or maybe its just me. While all of my friends cry and wail and consume large quantity of tissues over some supposedly romantic movie, I always sit there dried eye and will more often than not, be rolling those same eyes silly *grin* If my friends try to tell you that I'm actually just an underground kind of person when it comes to crying over movies and such, don't believe them :) They just find it hard to believe that there are some people who don't cry over corny love lines. I think dooey's just touched. And when people cry because they're touched by something you do for them, you'll feel ridiculously happy though they're crying. Haha. Wonder how that figure out *grin* I've never cried because I'm SO happy before. Hmm... makes me wonder how happy you must be before that happens :P Or maybe it varies for everyone. Maybe I'm just not the crying sort of person. Hehe. Crying is too much associated with weakness for me to be fond of it. So if you've seen me crying, don't laugh because its never a funny thing for me. Oh well.

Class 95 plays mushy, sentimental hits at this time of the night which I don't much mind :) Older songs. Less screamy, less angry, less love lost, less angst. For some reason, I like older songs. Maybe they are no longer relevant to our times where things are so much more complicated, but its still good to listen to something from the last millenium once in a while :)

Consider this lyric:
I don't know much. But I know I love you. That maybe all I need to know...

Haha, I think I just blew my cover as a 19 year old cynic *grin*

I wrote this a couple of days back :P Blogger was down.

Just read what YY posted on her bloggie. A forwarded, romantic Pre-U story that have people aww-ing away :P But I'm not doing that. I can't aww at such stuff anymore. The whole story just made me feel all old and jaded and been-there-done-that. I don't like feeling like that. Maybe that's because I know that I shouldn't. After all, I'm only 19. People should feel young and energetic at 19. They should feel that they have their whole life out in front of them instead of yawning and being cynical about everything. Haha. I do know that I have my whole life in front of me :) That's more than obvious. But I hate feeling like I know all about this lousy modern world, all of which is bad *roll eyes* Its all about expectations. The problem with me now is that I don't expect much from anyone or anything. It seems like I've conditioned myself in a way so as not to be caught off guard if something shitty happens, and what better way then to think the whole world is a load of shit ALL THE TIME. The thing is, I know its not like that. How complicated can it get *grin* Or maybe its just me *shrug* Most likely its me.

Don't like being melancholy, so I shan't *grin* I'm feeling genuinely happy for the first time in a long time :) You all should all be happy with me so that we can be happy family *evil laugh* That was really CRAP. And bad quality crap. Pardon me. ANYWAY, today was my free day. Its just lovely having Friday off because you get a long weekend. Everyone loves long weekends. And I get a SUPER long weekend because my Monday is off as well! Though of course, being the consistent student that I am, I usually pop down to campus to zap my notes for the week on Mondays. Then most naturally, I'll just end up going there a little too late to get anything done, and just waste more time hanging around with my wacky Uni people. How wonderful :)

Today was a wake up early, look sleepily at clock, realised its still early, drop back to sleepy-heads-land, and wake up a second time, look at clock with horrified expression, express bathe and dress, dash out of the door day. Was supposed to drop down town to have lunch with Yibin, but since he needs to study for some test they make them go through in NS, and I have to super eat my readings to keep up, we can just be nerdy non-nerds. I think I just can't read my readings when there is no real need to read them RIGHT NOW. Ever the procrastinator *look disgusted with self* I ended up chewing over the yummy books he brought with him. White Teeth by Zadie Smith and a couple of Japanese comics that feature a rubbery boy, pirates and chinese characters that I can hardly read *grin* I like White Teeth already. Like the way that lady writes. Like the snippetty feel to the whole layout. Like the jumping around style. After all its award winning *grin* They are supposed to be good :) Ooo.. nearly forgot! I'm now the proud owner of the TWO TOWERS vcd! *beams* Everyone is welcome to camp at my humble residence for six hour straight of LOTR magic(I have the Fellowship on DVD as well). Food and beverages will not be provided though. Bring your own :P hehe

I think I'm going Mambo again. Feel awfully bad about it for some reason. I think its got something to do with me saying that I'm not going again for a LONG time. And a month is just not a long time. Nor is two months for that matter. Feels like I'm not growing up like I should. Haha. Maybe that sounded a little serious, but its exactly how I feel! I'm 19 and I feel like I shouldn't club anymore because I should be more serious about things and be a responsible young adult who does not indulge in mindless fun :P Talk about irony. Or is it? Maybe I should really just drop the whole habit. Not healthy at all *nod* Then again, I want to go. I don't need to, but I sure want to. I miss mambo somewhat. Isn't it strange that I can not want to go to mambo for months on end, and then miss it after just three weeks? I think it has everything to do with Arts Bash being disgusting. Oh well. I'll stop going when I feel like it. And I really did feel like I'm going to stop clubbing *roll eyes* What wishful thinking.

Oh, Long ge's birthday was two days ago! hehe. Sorry for the lack of cake! HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY! You can now watch RA movie, get married without your parents' consent, get a tattoo, pierce your ears and get to vote(that is if you're living in the RIGHT part of the island)! Isn't life great?! *grin* I need to sleep to calm myself :) So there.

I'm getting chubby cheeks again! *grin* If you don't know, that's a REALLY good thing to happen :) My cheeks only get chubby when I'm happy *puff out cheeks* I really have no idea why. I don't feel that I eat more than usual when I'm happy, but I just get rounder in the face. What I do know is that I really CAN'T eat when I'm sad/upset/dying of some deep emotional shit :P I just kind of stop eating *shrug* Its not even like I don't want to eat. I want to eat because I just think skinny people look bad. So the next time you comment on how fat I'm getting in the face, and I look all offended, just know that I'm pretending. I'm glad that they're there :)

I like school. I like going to school and feeling like I'm doing something worthwhile. After eight months of slacking/working/whatever in-between students do, going to school everyday is just pure goodness. There is just something to do, and no matter how lazy you are, nobody can really live with nothing to do for long. Not that working is not doing something. Its just different. A lot more grown-up, and seriously, I doubt anyone really like to grow up because there is just too little incentives in it for us :P I don't like to grow up. Okay, that's childish. But sometimes I feel that its not being childish, but rather, its because I've grown up somewhat in the span of my twenty years to something of an adult, and thus I've became resistent to the concept of growing up. It precisely because I've grown up and know how hard it is not be little anymore, that's why I don't want to grow up *sigh* Okay, I know its rather complex. And if Junwen is reading this now, he'll just say that I'm a weird child, shakes his head and insist I'm still a kid *nod* Oh well. We can't all be Peter Pan can we?

Just had my first political science tutorial today :) Despite everything, I still think that I'm going to major in it. I like it the most out of my five modules. I think I'm just the kind of person who will like to major in political science *shrug* I just can't think of any particular reasons off hand like this. Anyway, today's tutorial was a pleasant surprise for me :) Due to unknown reasons, I'm the only one among my closer friends in school who takes PS as a module. Its also the only module I'm taking whose tutorial I have to attend ALONE. Haha. No biggie really. But I'm just the cliquey sort of person who likes to move around with friends instead of making small talk in order to generate more of friends :P Its just easier. So I'm more or less resigned to the fact that I'll have to sit through two hours of political talk and not making as much noise as I would have like *roll eyes* But surprise surprise! *grin* We only had to choose our tutorial questions to do and TADA, we can go! :) All in HALF AN HOUR! hehe. How nice! LALALA.

My eyes are hurting. I need to rest :P Haven't writen as much as I'll like, but I'll be back anyway. Til then.

Please go and take a peek at my dear dance partner's blog *grin* He had a lovely extract from the LOTR put up there. A wonderful little paragraph that I like very much and have remembered distinctly from the whole clunk of words in that almost impossibly thick book :) You see, its really quite cool to be an elf. While mortals, even big men like Boromir or even Aragorn(King of Men okay!!!), are having GREAT difficulties travelling with all the snow, Legolas get to look all amused and laugh and just RUN swiftly ahead of everyone *swoon* Do you get it?! Argh. Sometimes I just wish that somebody equally enthu about all this(other than my dear dance partner of course) will look/feel/get all excited about it with me *sigh* Somebody who'll know what I'm talking about and understand why I'm getting all hyper about a little paragraph. I may not be the expert of the LOTR, but I really do enjoy it. I love the language because it has a very archaic feel to it. Very old school. Very a-time-long-gone. A better, more valiant, more exciting, more black-and-white-instead-of-grey world.

Enough gushing for now :) Am getting myself the vcd even if I have to scrape money from my savings which is being rapidly depleted :P HMV is selling it rather cheap anyway! Wow. Its almost the end of the year! *excited jitters* SEE JUNWEN. You got me all excited! ARGH. hehe. I should go now. Don't have anything to write anyway! :)

I'm reporting live from YY Tan's residence, across the road from Dot's residence *grin* A change of scenary is always good for the system! *breathe in 'fresh' air that is shooting out of YY's aircon* Just waiting for Harold to finish printing my GEM tutorial. Actually came to YY's place to utilize her printer, but like all printers, they just love to die on you when you need it the most *shoot YY's printer scornful looks* Okay, Harold just very nicely printed out my one-paged essay! *clap* Time for me to apparate home :) See You! *disappear in a flash*

Had a really long day. And the problem is, its not even over yet ;P Oh yes, its already eight and all *roll eyes* but I just have to slog for another couple of hours working on an essay requiring me to be witty and imaginative. I can hardly muster up any creative juices *sigh* I should really sleep earlier *stare at bed longingly* I just can't. Morphing from nocturnal animal to chirpy morning bird takes time! I think I'm straining my eyes somewhat. Staring at the screen too much and have been feeling that my eyes want to leap out of my head more often than usual. Oh well. Got to get my butt down to YY's place to type out my yet to be conceived GEM essay. Wish me luck in courting the elusive creative writing people in my head :)

I love swimming. Just not today. Today is too slack a day to do proper laps and feel exhausted. Decided that I'll do well just to float around in the blue chlorinated water and feel happy. Got up rather early for a Monday *grin* As Monday is my free day, meaning that there is no need for my presence in school at all, I get to wake up whenever I want, depending on how late I slept last night. And considering that I've slept only at three thirty the night before due to a peer-pressured induced spur of hardwork, waking up at ten thirty is just short of a miracle. *"DIE ICM DIE!!!"*

I think that I'm losing my red streak. YY commented that she hardly see me wear red stuff nowadays, when it is REALLY my colour :P Feel a little bad because a nagging voice keep suggesting that I just may be growing out of it, and I don't like the idea at all. I use to have tons of red stuff. I had a red bag, a red, SUPER furry pencil case(which I'm still rather fond of), red, polka-dotted clips for my hair, and of course, there's my red OP jacket which I'm extremely attached to. I don't carry a red bag anymore. Neither do I use my red, furry pencil case, and I've been pretty much separated from my red jacket for some time. Maybe red is just the JC colour *shrug* The thing is, I'm almost certain that I still like it as much as before. I just wonder where all my red stuff went :P Maybe sub-consciously I don't find them appropriate anymore. How strange. Shall make it a point to make a list of all the red pieces of clothings I have. They too seems to be disappearing. Oh well.

Am reading Man and Boy now. One of those books which I always pick up to flip through for another few pages every time I go to Borders or Kino. The first couple of chapters got me rather amused when they depict a thirty year old guy having a premature seizure of mid-life crisis. Then I decided to turn to the back and read the little summary(sorry, forgot what this is called!). Turns out that its another broken family story where the guy strayed for one night, and things can't ever be as happy and sunshine-filled as before *sigh* I hate such stories. They are immensely sad. And as usual, there'll be a kid involved. A little kid. Seems like we're going to break the records by producing the largest generation of warped, screwed up kids ever, due to their parents' irresponsibility. Tsk. Not that all such kids are warped and screwed up. Its just that most of them are, and I just feel its not fair :P Not fair at all. That's why I'm getting apprehensive about getting married. It was SUPPOSED to be a happily after kind of thing. That was before divorce became legal and RAMPANT. I just can't imagine the weight of not giving my kid a proper home. I don't want to have that kind of responsibility. As I said, I have a responsibility problem. A big one ;P

Was enjoying being submerged in water just now, and at the same time catching up with some girl talk. Ex-boyfriends and other vices came up :P For some rather obscure reasons, I don't really like the topic. I get too confused about what is the truth and what is not, about what is fair and what is unfair. I like everything to be fair and clear and transparent, but sometimes things are just not meant to be like that. Picked up some torture-your-ex-boyfriend tactics from some experts *grin* but I know I won't ever use them *shrug* I just find the idea of ex-boyfriend bitching rather uncomfortable. So I shan't do it :) Huiling said that I can't be too nice. Haha. I want to laugh in her face *secretive smile* Don't think I'm nice. Because I'm not! *evil laugh* Don't get all freak out by Dot's evilness :) She likes to pretend a lot *grin* From the looks of things, I'm a little GREY :p Don't laugh. I'm serious! *look anxious at newly acquired tan* It IS really rather grey. Oh well. Nothing I can do now. Maybe it'll fade faster than the more conventional dark brown ones *shrug*

I just found the most apt explanation of the difference between 'in love' and 'love'.

Love is what's left after being in love has gone, okay? It's when you care about someone and hope they're happy, but you're not under any illusions of them. Maybe that kind of love is not is not exciting and passionate and all those things that fade with time. All those things that you're so keen on. But in the end, its the only kind of love that really matters. -extracted from Man and Boy, pg 124-

How true! :)

Seemingly, James is pretty upset with me for cancelling our blading session at East Coast. I feel rather bad. SORRY JAMESIE! Tsk. If you're wondering, I didn't lie or anything about my relatives coming to my place. My mum just made a lot of noise about me going out because she had apparantly told me about them coming over :P *sigh* I'm stuck man James, hope you understand. Oh well. Will make it up to you in some way :) Just let me think about it yah? *grin* Got to get ready for school now :P Off to the intellectual discussion on the evolution of our society in the face of an IT onslaught *look bland* How very interesting. Not to mention that I have tons of notes to be zapped. I hate zapping of notes. Some zapping fairies should just help me get them done over the night and place them nicely on my table for my use the next morning *roll eyes* But of course, the fairytales just don't come true when you really NEED them too!